Friday, October 8, 2010

Cancer moms

I went to the hospital last night, but not for Cami. I went to meet a group of ladies who have given me advice, listened to me vent and have been an inspiration to me the last few months. Some of these women have been coming to the hospital a lot longer than we have, some actually live there, others are just starting their fight like us.
We all have kids with cancer.
We all understand.
I love them all.

I did not write this, but it just sums up how I feel so perfectly...

I belong to a special group of women
My friends and I have an amazing bond.
We never wanted to be in this group,
Yet we are in, for life.
Maybe we have met, maybe we haven’t,
Yet our love for each other is boundless.
We know the pain the other one feels,
And we share our victories small or huge.
Words like chemo, IV, Zofran , bald heads
Are always parts of our conversations,
As well as roidrage, tears, and meltdowns…
We always know where the closest puke bucket is ,
We can hold it in one hand and if necessary,
Swallow the sandwich the other hand was holding.
We can drive to the hospital ,
Park in the dark parking garage
Make our way thru the halls of the hospital
And to the appropriate floor,
Settle in a room, turn the TV on,
Give instructions to the head nurse,
Silence loud beeping IV pumps,
Direct a wagon AND an IV pole
To the playroom without hitting anything
Make our way back to the correct room
And all this, mind you, With our eyes closed at any given time.
We know how to draw blood from lines
Sticking out of little kids chests.
We can hold them down with one hand ,
While a nasogastric tube is inserted in their little nose,
And be on the phone with their dads at the same time.
We can live for days on hospital food,
And on maybe only one meal a day .
We know the names of up to 20 different drugs ,
Their purpose, dosage and time to be taken.
We are always on call, 24 hours a day ,
Seven days a week.
We are used to not always looking our best,
Hard to do with only a few hours of sleep . M
ake up , hair styling, skirts are words of the past .
We have become addicted to texting ,
hospital, clinic, home, wherever…
We talk sometimes at all hours of the night ,
We know we can count on someone to be up.
Then for one of us , the world stops .
She has to walk away, broken.
This job is over .
The job is over, but the fight is on.
Remember , I said we were in this forever.
We are friends, sisters, temporary nurses,
We are each others rock, each others punching bag,
We listen , we vent , we cry , we laugh together .
We share our lives and our deaths
We share our pain and our victories.
We are strong, but not by choice ,
Sometimes we win , sometimes we lose,
But never are we defeated .
We are not nurses
We are not doctors,
We are cancer moms…

(sorry Marie, we took this after you left)


  1. what fun! that is so awesome that you all got to do that! i bet it was very therapeutic for everyone. talking with people who have gone/are going through the same thing as you is so wonderful! they provide support and relief in a totally unique way.

    i'd love to meet up with you all too sometime. i only recognize just a few people in that picture - it's be fun to meet some more people!

  2. I am so so happy that you have that unique support system. What a blessing!

  3. I love this BLOG! Thank you for sharing this with us all! All of you MOMS ROCK! You are so strong and I admire you for that! Love you so much!

    Love Nat

  4. Yet another blog post I am copying! It was so nice to get together! Nobody gets like you women get it. Thanks for the wonderful night!

  5. You are amazing women! Thank you for sharing with us a glimpse of what life is like for you as a cancer mom! amazing!!

  6. I think I'll swipe that poem too to share on my blog if that's okay. Loved it!!

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  9. Oh my gosh I want to steal that poem! It was seriously the most awesome night! We got to talk and vent and not have to over explain ourselves (because no one usually knows what we're talking about...) It was a awesome night and I hope we do it again soon! Thanks for the yummy food!!

  10. What a terrific support group! I'm just so sorry that they all have to deal with this. What a beautiful group of young mothers! We'll include them in our prayers too.

  11. That is really neat for you guys! Iam grateful you all have some understanding from one another.

  12. OH how I ache for these precious, innocent children who do not deserve to go thru Childhood Cancer! I also ache for my daughter and ALL you cancer moms who are in pain as well. There is defiantly an invisible umbilical cord that is never severed between a mother and child. It's so heartbreaking to see your child go thru any type of trial. I'm so grateful Chelsea have found a group of wonderful women who have given her encouragement, info, peace, support and most of all.....UNDERSTANDING. Your children are CANCER-MOM's are amazing! Much love, admiration and respect to you all!!!!


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